For a long time I self-soothed in the best way that I knew how - by focusing on my body and food. Click here to learn how I now manage my challenges and also reassure you that if you're currently struggling - you're not alone.

My decision to stop dancing was both the hardest and best decision I’ve ever madeAlong with the immense relief I felt, it also meant admitting I was deeply unhappy on the path that I had wrapped so much of my worth in – becoming a dancer in a big city.

Transitions are undeniable very tough. And looking back, I coped with moving to a brand new city the best way I knew how at the time – by focusing on food and my body.

But now (after over a decade of therapy and a whole lotta self-work), I’ve learned that the only way to truly come out of a struggle is to go through it. To actually feel your feelings (I know). This lesson holds true for my more tumultuous times and present day.

You can’t diet your way out of loneliness. A Whole30 reset probably won’t reset your romantic relationship. And a spring detox won’t rid you of the toxic people in your life who are making you feel like crap.

So now when I hear the faint echoes of my dieting mind, I’ve learned to pause and gently ask myself: “What’s actually going on right now?”

Rachel Cole wrote a powerful piece right after the US election. Her words resonated so deeply with my past desires to leave my body (by restricting my food) whenever strong emotions surfaced. She also shares an alternative that’s available to every one of us, and that’s to stay.

Stay in your body. Just sidle up next to whatever sensation is coursing through your flesh. Feel the pain. Notice the quality of your breath. Are you hungry? Cold? Perhaps the best way to describe here is ‘numb’? That’s all welcome. Stay. The body knows and it has evolved over millennia to process trauma like many of us are experiencing. These processes require little effort on our part other than loving presence…other than staying with kindness. – Rachel W Cole

If you feel like food is occupying too many of your thoughts, I encourage you to dig a bit deeper. Stay. Breathe in kindness as you ask yourself what you need.

And always ask for help if you need it.  Because you are not and never will be alone in this beautiful mess of life.

PS: If you enjoyed this note from my heart, you might also like to read these notes: The three most important nutrition lessons I’ve learned, Living as if & Finding peace in the process.

PPS: Last week I shared A BUNCH of links that I’m loving – recipes, blogs, books galore! If you missed it, you can check out my fav food & non-food discoveries here.

Wishing you a wonderful Wednesday! xo

claire-rhn-2

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